By law, I should be allowed to be cranky today. I got my "special time of the month" a week early this month. And it really pisses me off. But, actually, now that I think about it, it really doesn't because if it would have happened when it was supposed to happen I would be crampy and cranky on Thanksgiving day. And, really, who wants to make a turkey when they're bleeding like a stuck pig? Besides the fact that I won't be pms'ing on my four day weekend. Of course, I will be crabby this weekend, but happy next. And this means that, had it happened when it was supposed to, I would also be feeling like shit for Christmas. So, in a way this early visit from Aunt Flo is a good thing all the way around. I know, way too much information for a Friday morning.
And, I'll be happy to report that I got my way. Not that anybody would be surprised by that news because I'm pretty persuasive when I want to get my way. We will be having a nice, quiet Thanksgiving at home with just the two of us. We even went grocery shopping last night and got a Butterball turkey. To me, and I'm not really wise on all things poultry, it makes no difference on the brand of the turkey, but to Dennis, apparently it does. So, rather than spending $.87 a pound for the no-name brand he decided we must spend $1.42 a pound for a Butterball. Hey, he bought all the groceries last night so what do I care? All I know is that Thanksgiving day will be filled with turkey and all the trimmings, football, booze, and weed. And we don't have to leave the house unless we want to. No screaming kids, no standing in line to get cold turkey - given that there is any turkey left by the time we get there. No gross jello salad filled with fruit that nobody knows what the hell it even is (Jello Shit Surprise is the official name of this dish - don't believe me? Look it up.). No sweet potatoes with marshmallows *gross* and no real full fat butter. No coming up with a secret signal that we can use when we're both ready to go - which usually winds up happening before the food even comes out. I can even get the boxes out of the basement filled with all of the Christmas decorations and set them out for tree trimming on Black Friday. Yes, I can be domestic when the mood strikes.
Speaking of Black Friday - you won't catch me anywhere near any kind of shopping facility until I get my last paycheck before Christmas and I join all the idiots that are all out doing their last minute shopping. I don't get the appeal of going to a crowded mall, loaded with sweaty, smelly people with poopy, smelly kids standing in a line for an hour to buy a few pairs of socks.
So, what are your plans for Thanksgiving? Will you be in Thanksgiving hell or Thanksgiving heaven?
