Fucking Blogger. Had the hardest time posting this today. Kept timing out, then I would have to retype. Not a good sign for today.
If you've already heard about this and don't want to hear about it anymore, then you should stop reading:
Now.
Ok, you're going to continue. So don't bitch me out for talking about something that you already know about okay? You've been warned.
If you're a daily blog reader you heard me bitching and moaning last week about having to go have a physical and the nasty vampire lady that stole my blood. So, yesterday, my doctor's office calls and the conversation goes something like this: (Surprise!!!)
Me: Hi, this is Sue. How can I help you? (in a very pleasant, non-threatening tone) Nurse Ratched: This is Nurse Ratched from your doctors office. Me: Good morning. And how may I be of service to you on this glorious Tuesday morning? Nurse Ratched: Your lab results came back and I need to call a prescription in for you. Me: A prescription? Nurse Ratched: Yes, a prescription you imbecile. Where do you want it filled? Me: A prescription for what? Nurse Ratched: A prescription for Shut the Hell Up. It's none of your business what it's for. Me: Wow, okay. Nurse Ratched: If you must know, you have a problem with your thyroid. Me: I do? What kind of problem? Nurse Ratched: Fuck! You ask a lot of stupid questions. How the fuck should I know? I'm a nurse. Me: Okay, so, does this thyroid problem have a name? Nurse Ratched: Fuck. Hold on. I'll have to check the file. Me: Take your time. Nurse Ratched: Ok, it says here - hmmm...I just had it - oh, here it is. Hypothyroid. Me: That's an underactive thyroid no? Nurse Ratched: I don't fucking know. Me: Okay, now what kind of prescription is this? Nurse Ratched: It's called synthoid, or something. Me: Are there any side effects from this drug? Nurse Ratched: Again, with the stupid questions. I'll have the doctor call you. Where do you want it filled? Me: Well, let's see. Should I have it filled by work or by home, let me think a second. Nurse Ratched: Don't fucking strain yourself. I'll just mail the thing to you and you can decide on your own time. Me: No, it's okay, fill it at the Walgreens by work. Nurse Ratched: I don't have time for this shit. I'll just mail it. *click*
note: for all you people who were born after Ronald Reagan took office, Nurse Ratched is the bitch ass, extremely uptight, masochistic nurse from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.
And that was it. Okay, so her lines in that scenario were actually her inner dialog but I swear I did hear her say all that. Well, except for the cursing and name calling the conversation was pretty dead on. I did wind up getting the prescription filled and have begun, now, day 2 of this silly little game of taking a pill every morning. Of course, I still haven't talked to the doctor since he wasn't in yesterday. But after what I tell you next, I really need to make an appointment to sit down and talk with the sneaky bastard.
Naturally, since Nurse Ratchet was a complete BitchNurseMonster I decided to take it upon myself and do a little research on the internet. I was shocked, and I mean shocked at the symptoms and how I have almost all of them - except for a few. Mainly, weight gain and obesity is off the list. We all know by now that THAT doesn't apply here. But, who knows, if I've always had hypothyroid maybe that's why I shot up to 190 pounds to begin with. And it could explain why I'm always tired, cold, and irritable.
However, it was the very last symptom made my blood curl - it was infertility. And, as everybody probably knows by now, I've never ever been able to get my baby maker working. I haven't used birth control in 24 years. My vagina doctor claims everything appears as normal and there's no explanation. And it's not like I really want to get it to work at this stage of my life. Then I got to thinking - if the reason my oven is on the fritz is because of my thyroid, and I start taking medicine to get my thyroid pumping again could I possibly reverse the infertility and wind up pregnant? And if that's the case, then I should probably get on the pill immediately? But, I don't want to take the pill if it's not likely to do that. What a pickle!!
So, when the fucking doctor calls me I think I need to setup and appointment, not only to talk to his ass about what the hell is going on with my thyroid, but to tell him what a BitchNurseMonster his sorry excuse for a nurse is. And, we all know how much I bask in the glory of doing that!
I commented on your topic on WW yesterday. Anywho, it's just nuts and I hope the bitch gets fired. I also got results yesterday of my blood work and I'm like .10 higher than normal, no biggie. But damn, I sure as hell would want some info! Like "yeah, I'm an idiot and will just take some meds for the rest of my life without any info?" And the fertility thing, I don't blame you. Who wants to be on the pill? It's made me a little "hormonal", so say the least & having a kid at 38 was tough on me. Good luck!
I realize I'm kind of late here, but that was hysterical!!!! Inner dialogue!
I have the thyroid thing too, just got diagnosed about a month ago.
I hope you get the answers you need about the babymaker thing. I'm 42, I have 3 kids but they are adults basically now so I couldn't imagine starting over now!
I commented on your topic on WW yesterday. Anywho, it's just nuts and I hope the bitch gets fired. I also got results yesterday of my blood work and I'm like .10 higher than normal, no biggie. But damn, I sure as hell would want some info! Like "yeah, I'm an idiot and will just take some meds for the rest of my life without any info?" And the fertility thing, I don't blame you. Who wants to be on the pill? It's made me a little "hormonal", so say the least & having a kid at 38 was tough on me. Good luck!