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Chicken Wings and Boobie Tassels

Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Death and Menopause
Well, I made it into work today. Despite having cramps that feel like my entire uterus is in a vice. You know, most women dread the day that they stop having to buy tampons but, me, I'm looking forward to it! I mean, come on already! Let's get this show on the road. It's not like my baby maker was ever used for that purpose anyway. It was broke to begin with so I say rot on.

Anyway, I feel like shit and would much rather be curled up on the couch with a blanket and a remote control. And having Dennis wait on me hand and foot. Now that's living! Unfortunately for me, however, I have a stupid stinking job that I have to get up at 5:00am every weekday morning to get to.

And, now that I'm on the whole "let's get menopause rolling already" bandwagon, let's go for broke! Come on 2028! Because, by my calculations, I'll be 65 years old then and I'll finally be able to collect social security. Now, I'm not a pessimist by any means, however I really doubt there will actually be any social security by the time I'm able to collect it. Shit, who am I kidding. I'll die hunched over my desk lying in a pool of my own vomit - but I'll have a smile on my face because I'll never have to work again!
posted by suebiedoobie @ 7:39 AM  
4 Comments:
  • At Tuesday, August 21, 2007 9:03:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Sounds like you need to go back on the birth control pills. That totally sucks!

    Is Dennis off work today from the weather? If so, you could leave work early and curl up on the couch with him still. Man, this gloomy rainy weather is not going to end is it? Today was even worse with it being all foggy. Ugh!

    I'm not expecting there to be any SS when I get to that age. Well, there might be some left, but if they keep raising the age to start collecting I'll be 85 before I see any. Luckily Mike has a really good pension with the fire department and I am saving up money in a 401K.

     
  • At Tuesday, August 21, 2007 9:55:00 AM, Blogger Wildsissy said…

    FLAXSEED! I'M NOT FRAKIN KIDDING!! I've been using organic ground flaxseed just 1 T per day and my period was NOTHING super light etc. Plus, it might help with your headaches and what not.. remember the whole magnesium deficincy thing? Yeah, flaxseed has magnesium in it! woot! I add 1 T of ground flaxseed to 1 T of pb2 (the powdered peanut butter) and spread it on my english muffin.. total 2 pts! It's super yummy, keeps me full until lunch, and flaxseed has some other major benefits.. appetite supressant, it controls cravings (I have NONE now), lowers cholesteral and high blood pressure, has Omega 3 in it.. on and on.. fiber etc.. a whole package. just try it for 30 days, it costs $3 for a bag of it that last lasted me months (I've been using it off and on). It can't hurt!

    http://www.whfoods.org/genpage.php?tname=foodspice&dbid=81

     
  • At Tuesday, August 21, 2007 10:02:00 AM, Blogger suebiedoobie said…

    wow, talk about a tough sell!! *S*

    I'll give it a shot!!

     
  • At Tuesday, August 21, 2007 11:53:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Sue, you are crackin me up today! I don't think your situation is funny, it's just the way you say stuff! Hope you feel better soon.

     
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