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Remember when I told you you'll have to put up with my vacation photos on here in the very near future?
Well, fuck that. You get to see the hell I get to go through to get to work....through pictures! Yea, I know. what could be fucking worse than having to put up with me ranting at least three times a week about traffic? Having to see it in pictures!! Yea, lame, I know.
It started out good enough. I made it out of the driveway and didn't even have to stop. I thought this was a good sign, but little did I know what waited for me around the corner. Wall to wall stopped dead traffic. What the fuck? There's never traffic here - it usually starts about 5 miles down the road. And you know what that means? I'm pretty much fucked.
So, I turn around and go the other direction. That proved to be even worse. So, I decided I'll just go back the original direction and deal with it. It took me about 25 minutes to travel about 7 miles to get to my turn off. And you wonder why I'm insane?
As soon as I make my turn what greets me?
Yea. It's blurry and not real clear but I'll tell you what the fuck it is. A big ass truck with a big ass trailer carrying a load of some shit that's piled up way too fucking high and not tied down in the back at all. And the asshole knows it because he's only going 30 miles per hour. In a fucking 55 mile an hour zone. Complete asshat. Yea, I know, they have to get to where they're going too. But if you're going to drive a truck that isn't loaded properly have the decency to do it at a better hour.
So, as soon as I get around this dumbfuck I get this:
Yea, you guessed it. A fucking mini van full of kids with the mom behind the wheel - pulls out right in front of me. And goes about 35 miles an hour. People, if you're going to pull out in front of a Mustang then, please, for the love of God, do the fucking speed limit okay? Sweet Jesus. After about 7 minutes of that annoying shit the dumb bitch driving the mini van finally turns and lets me go about my way. So, it's smooth sailing for about 7 miles then, lo and behold, I'm about to encounter Long Grove. The pit of traffic hell. 
Fuck!!! This is when I start downloading these fucking pictures to my photo site. I have the time. I also apply some lipstick, some mascara, some eyeliner. Hell, if I had a laptop computer I could have written War and Peace. And still had time to pleasure myself.
And here I am, 20 minutes later. Its blurry because I'm slapping my face with my phone trying to wake myself up. Still fucking backed up. Christ!! Well, there is good news to all this shit. I got to work at 8:05 (35 minutes late) and nobody is here yet!! You know what that means? Nobody knows I'm fucking late!! Score!! It's going to be a beautiful day! |
Drive naked. It'll put you in a better mood.