QuitMeter Counter courtesy of www.quitmeter.com.

Chicken Wings and Boobie Tassels

Friday, July 21, 2006
Offensive Driving Class
.....
You've all heard me rant about the dumbesttrafficticketintickethistory in other posts, right? Ok, so you don't actually read this and have no idea what the hell I'm talking about, yet again.

Well, in order to save myself from having points on my drivers license (and, really, to save myself a couple hundred a month in auto insurance - that's what having a high performance car does to you) I'm opting for the court supervision. I initially was going to fight the ticket because it was a completely lame ass ticket, but thought about it and, really, was afraid I would lose. As a part of said court supervision I have to take this stupid ass defensive driving course. The only good thing is I can take it online - which means I don't have to sit in a fucking classroom full of sweaty asstrouts (I love that word!!) for 4 hours on a Saturday morning.

Yesterday I received in the mail information on where to log in to do this stupid ass online defensive driving course. I decided I would get a good start on the damned thing because I have to have it completed in a timely manner - whatever that means - I don't recall how much time I actually have. Something about it having to be done before I get my next period, but I'm not sure. I actually completed the first 2 sections of this stupid thing last night. And, ohmyfuckinggod, is it completely boring!! And takes forever to load. I think that's to prevent asstrouts like me from not actually reading it and continuously hitting NEXT as soon as it loads to get to the next part. But, no, it loads really really slow and pauses for about 60 seconds before allowing you to hit next - so you can ponder the material. Do I do that? Hell no. I just flip to another browser window and check out shit on EBay. Can't do that in a classroom now can you?

The funniest thing is the tests at the end of the section. Talk about completely lame. I mean, if you can't pass these tests without actually reading the material then, seriously, you're way too stupid to drive. Example - here's a question from this insanely idiotic test (probably not an actual question, but you'll get my point):

If you come up on a yellow traffic light what do you do?
A). Stop before it turns Red
B). Swerve around the car in front of you that stops before it turns red
C). Plow into the asstrout that is stopped at the yellow light before it turns red
D). Go like hell, it's gonna turn red

What I generally do is pick the exact opposite of what I would actually do in this situation - which would always be D) Go like hell, it's gonna turn red. The opposite would be to A) Stop before it turns Red. I mean, seriously, do we need to sit for 45 minutes of this section of the materials to know this shit?


Okay, I know what you're thinking if you're an avid blog reader - if anybody needs this fuckrageous defensive driving course it would be me. And, as much as I hate to admit it, you're absolutely correct. I'm a complete fucktard behind the wheel. And, I promise that I will keep my road rage under control, I won't allow other drivers on the road to control my driving, and I'll always remain courteous and allow others to drive like asshats all around me without flying off in a rage.

Any bets on how long that will last?
posted by suebiedoobie @ 7:41 AM  
1 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home
 

Six Foot Model - Too Young

This is my Brain on the Web...Where are the Damned Comments People?
About Me

Name: suebiedoobie
Home: Illinois, United States
About Me: I'm married with dog. Kids freak me out.
See my complete profile
Previous Post
Archives
Shoutbox


It's ALMOST SPRING!!!

Links
Slideshow Time!

Free Blogger Templates