I'm generally a pretty strange person. And, if you're a daily reader of this stupid little blog then I don't have to tell you that. But, what I'm actually referring to is my morning routine. We all have our little routines that we do to get ready for work, get ready to take the kidlets to school, or whatever the fuck you do when you wake up then immediately have to go someplace.
My problem with my routine this morning is that it didn't fall to plan because of my inability to keep my Sunday evening routine of setting the fucking alarm. So, I wake to my dear husband shaking me at 6:15 this morning saying, "Hey, dipshit, weren't you supposed to be up a half an hour ago?". To which my reply 2 seconds after I find out I'm going to be late to work is, "FUUUUUUCK". So, I decide to take a quickie little shower, not wash my hair (I washed it yesterday - I'm not that fucking gross) throw on some makeup, get dressed and walk out the door. I can do this in 1/2 an hour right? And I did. But, I did need a little help from my friend Mr. Caffeine. And the reason I started today's blog with "I'm generally a pretty strange person" is because I'm the one out of 5 people in the United States today that doesn't drink coffee. I get my caffeine fix from good ole Diet Pepsi.
I'm thinking that the nitwit scientist that they asked about this has never actually taken heroine or cocaine because, sorry, how many people have you heard of that will suck dick for caffeine? Seriously.
There may be some actual truth in that statement, however. I am a big bitch - even bigger than usual if I don't have caffeine in the morning. So, luckily for you, I have 3 cans of the beautifully caffeinated, sparkling, bubbly Diet Pepsi to get me through the day. I guess if I run out, I can always prostitute myself for the buck fifty the Dunkin Donuts across the street charges for a single Diet Pepsi.
ahhhh....Bethany!! I knew you would post a comment to my blog *yay*