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Tuesday, July 18, 2006
My Sister's Daughter
...
First and foremost before we get into this whole thing today, let me say I do dearly love my niece. But, unfortunately, I can't stand the person she's become. She's selfish, immature, and extremely manipulative. But, she's also very sweet, kind, and a good mother. I love her, but I hate her too. I really hate to say that, but it's how I feel.

My sister's husband died from cancer at the age of 41 (I believe he was 41 - about 7 years ago) when my niece was the very tender age of 15 years old. She had to see her father shrivel up and die from a horrible disease, and that had to have been very difficult to bear, to say the least, for both my sister and her daughter. It wasn't an overnight illness that took him either, everybody knew that, eventually, this was going to kill him. You see, he had been diagnosed with malignant melanoma 5 years prior to his death. At that time, the doctors had removed a mass and did about a billion fucking tests to find out where it came from - because, the one thing they knew for absolute sure, is that it was a secondary cancerous tumor. Meaning, that it came from somewhere else in his body. But from where? That was the million dollar question.

My niece, from what I can figure out, really needed her father. Her mother, my sister, is a very dear woman but very....Naive. She's very book smart, but lacks the basic common sense that most people have (I digress - very few people have, from what I'm discovering). She can be easily manipulated and convinced of things. Her father, on the other hand, was the primary disciplinary figure of the household. He's the one that would put on the breaks. He wouldn't fall for the batting of the eyelashes thing, unlike my sister. I think my sister over compensated for her daughter losing her father by allowing her way too much freedom for a 15 year old girl. So much so, that at the age of 16 she was getting married and preparing to give birth to her first child. Which meant, unfortunately for my sister, that since her daughter is married that she loses the social security she was getting for her. Which not only put a financial strain on my sister since she lost a great deal of money each month, but also that she is now supporting her daughter, her daughter's husband, and their new baby.

My niece and her husband do try hard, I will give them that. But, they are young and completely into the ME stage of life. A few years after having their first child, and while still on public aid, they decide to have a second child. Now, I completely understand where it would be desirable to have your children close to each other in age, and to get it over with and have the second one before the first one is out of diapers and in school, however - when you are on public aid the last thing one should be doing is planning a pregnancy, especially when the father of these children is in nursing school and they are all still living with Mom.

I'm all for public aid and assistance for people who need it. Unfortunately, there are so many out there, like my niece in this blog, that tend to abuse the system. My other sister spends about $800 dollars a month on health insurance for her husband and herself. Yes, $800 dollars a MONTH!! She recently had surgery on her neck. Since insurance and health care in this country sucks so much ass (unless, of course, you don't have any insurance or a job but you have kids - then you'll get it all for free), my sister's insurance company would only pay so much of the bill and she's stuck with about $20,000 in medical bills as of this date. To me, it seems completely unfair that a young woman on public aid would plan a pregnancy knowing that she will need a C-Section because she knows she won't have to pay for it. To me, personally, I believe this to be a major travesty on the part of my niece. I love her, I sincerely do, but don't have another baby when you can't afford the one you have, okay?

Getting to the point. My nieces 2 boys are now 5 and 3 years of age and are stunningly beautiful little kids - just like my niece. They are still living with my sister but are purchasing my sisters house at the end of this month. My sister is currently shopping for another home - either a single family home or a condo, something that she won't have to share with 2 other adults and 2 children. I suggested to my sister yesterday that she might want to consider living with my niece and her husband for a year and let them pay the mortgage while she shops and saves her money and finally buys a newer car with air conditioning (you KNOW my nieces new car has air conditioning). She deserves it, right? My sister told me yesterday that her daughter wants her to move out of the house once they close on it - they are a young couple that need to be alone with their children. Ummmmmm.....can you spell UNGRATEFUL spoiled little bitch?!?!?!?!

Anyway, my sister's daughter. I love her, but I hate her. I'm sure everybody can relate to at least one person in their life like this.


On a side note: I will now, officially, never be able to tell my sister this blog exists. But, that's okay. I have to have a place that I can talk about this stupid stuff before it makes me insane. Well, more insane than usual.
posted by suebiedoobie @ 7:59 AM  
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